Movie: How can you trust a man who wears both a belt and suspenders? The man can't even trust his own pants.

It's mid-April, and school is finally over for another semester. This means a number of things, (Frosty Treat, warmer weather, etc) but most importantly it means that I finally have time to be lazy and watch movies, without feeling guilty about it.

To celebrate I decided to watch Sergio Leone's 1968 western epic, Once Upon a Time in the West. I attempted to watch it on the bus back from Quebec City last month, but sadly my laptop died and there were no plugs on the bus. wtf?

The film is written and directed by Sergio Leone (the man behind The Good the Bad and the Ugly) and stars Henry Fonda (Frank) and Charles Bronson (Harmonica) in opposing roles.

I could tell from my previous brief attempt at watching this movie that it would be great. The opening scene, which clocks in at nearly 14 minutes, contains almost no dialogue (except for a sweet burn by Bronson) and is incredibly irritating (let's just say there's a fly buzzing, water dripping, and a windmill in serious need of oil). As annoying as it is, the intro is extremely enticing and it makes you interested in what is going to happen next. It finally culminates with Charles Bronson being bad-ass as hell.

I found an edited down version of the opening. Imagine this, but with 6 more minutes of water dripping and flies buzzing.

Immediately after that ^^^^^ scene you are introduced to a family of gingers living in the desert. Mr. McBain and his family are preparing for the arrival of his new wife, who he met in New Orleans. Before her arrival though, the family (including the children) is gunned down by a pack of outlaws, so instead of arriving to meet her new family, Jill McBain arrives at their funeral.

The rest of the movie (which is quite long at nearly 3 hours) revolves around the fight for the McBain's land (which is prized for its water) and Harmonica's mysterious quest for retribution.

Going into the movie I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to handle three hours of spaghetti western , but the movie is fantastic, and I didn't have a problem paying attention. Not to mention Jill is a babe, and there are some hilarious/bad-ass quotes. For example:

Harmonica: I saw three of these dusters a short time ago, they were waiting for a train. Inside the dusters, there were three men.
Cheyenne: So?
Harmonica: Inside the men, there were three bullets.

Cheyenne: You know, Jill, you remind me of my mother. She was the biggest whore in Alameda and the finest woman that ever lived. Whoever my father was, for an hour or for a month - he must have been a happy man.

It has apparently become known as Sergio Leone's ~masterpiece~. Having only seen this and The Good, the Bad, etc, I couldn't tell you if this is true or not. But what I can tell you is, it is an excellent movie and if you ever feel like watching a western it may as well be this one.

Cheers,

Pat


PS Check out this guy. http://lights-camera-jackson.com/ He is an extremely abrasive 11 year old film critic. Listening to him is like listening to someone announce a horse race. As annoying as he is to listen to, he does have some brutal things to say about some shitty movies, and I can always back that. Not to mention he ONLY 11 YEARS OLD.